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The Comparison Game
Once I knew, I couldn’t stop seeing myself through his new eyes.
The wrinkles I earned from years of laughter and stress.
The body that had carried children.
The exhaustion I wore like a second skin.
Suddenly, everything about me felt like a flaw.
I imagined her—smooth skin, bright smile, untouched by decades of responsibility. I imagined how proud he must feel walking beside her.
And I wondered when I stopped being enough.
How Quickly a Life Can Collapse
Within weeks, he was gone.
Not just emotionally—physically.
He moved into a new apartment. He posted pictures online with her. Pictures where he looked younger, lighter, happier. People commented heart emojis and congratulations.
No one asked about me.
I stayed behind in the house that still smelled like him. His coffee mug on the counter. His jacket in the closet. A life frozen in place while the world moved on without me.
Nights were the worst.
The silence screamed.
The Younger Woman Everyone Talked About
People tried to be kind.
“She’ll leave him.”
“It won’t last.”
“He’ll regret it.”
But none of that mattered.
What mattered was that he chose her.
I stalked her social media more times than I’d ever admit. I compared myself to every photo. Every smile. Every dress.
And every time, I lost.
Or so I thought.
The Loneliness No One Warns You About
Divorce isn’t just paperwork.
It’s waking up and realizing no one knows your schedule anymore.
It’s cooking for one and throwing half of it away.
It’s hearing a joke and turning to share it—only to remember you’re alone.
Friends slowly drifted. Some didn’t know what to say. Others sided with him. Some were simply uncomfortable around my pain.
I learned something brutal:
When your marriage ends, people don’t just choose sides.
They choose distance.
Trying to Rebuild Myself
I tried to be strong.
I joined a gym.
I changed my hair.
I forced myself to go out.
Everyone said, “This is your glow-up era.”
But healing isn’t a makeover montage.
It’s messy.
It’s quiet.
It’s crying in your car before walking into the grocery store.
Some days I felt empowered.
Other days I could barely get out of bed.
Still, I kept going.
Because what choice did I have?
Then Life Took a Cruel Turn
About a year after he left, I got a call.
I almost didn’t answer.
It was a mutual friend—her voice shaky.
“He’s in the hospital,” she said. “It’s serious.”
My first reaction shocked me.
I felt nothing.
Then everything.
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